This is a song by Kelly Clarkson which I rewrote because I can :P The Original song wasn't doing it for me
When anyone asks I tell them we just grew apart
And hope to god they believe me
When I say that it wasn't my heart
That broke and that it wasn't me that wanted more time
I'll pretend I'm okay with it all, act like there's nothing wrong
Wake me up when sunrise starts to bring peace
I just want to open my eyes and know the hurting is over
These tears never fall…sobs stuck in my throat
My heart refuses to cry…It just won't cry
And I'm strangled in my own pride
I'll pretend it doesn't bother me when they watch me
Waiting for me to break down
If anyone asks me I'll say I'm over you already
And what do I care if they believe me or not
I'll pretend to be above it all
Whenever I see you, I'll swallow my tears and stifle the sobs
I'll pretend that I'm okay with it all, act like there's nothing wrong
I'll laugh about you having someone new
And tell you I'm happy for you
I'll act like it doesn't bother me that she's more interesting than me
I'll wrap my arms around myself
When they poke at my wounds
Trying to make me feel
Encouraging me to cry
I'll talk in circles, act mature
I'm lying they all know it
Wake me up when sunrise starts to bring peace
I just want to open my eyes and know the hurting is over
And the nights are not as long and restless
And my fist no longer stops my sobs
And I'm no longer strangled in my own dignity
Is this what it feels when your heart is too proud to cry?
5 comments:
and I thought you were improving..!!
I've never seen a broken poem like this b4..! there is no flow, no musical rhythm to it, although it was taken from a song..!! i haven't heard the song, but still, the beat is completely wiped out..!
tell me you r not trying to mock that song by disgracing it like this..!!
i know, i haven't been so critisizing lately, and this is not an attempt to make up for it.. this poem (if i can call it that) really one of your worst..!!
sorry.. :P
I have always been a bit tone deaf when it comes to songs..I just wanted it to have more depth...Kaifyyy when I wanna butcher a song I'll go right ahead.... :P I dont know kint malaneh...
If anyone asks
I'll tell them we both just moved on
When people all stare
I'll pretend that i don't hear them talk
Whenever i see you, i'll swallow my pride and bite my tongue
Pretend i'm okay with it all
Act like there's nothing wrong
Is it over yet
Can i open my eyes?
Is this as hard as it gets
Is this what it feels like to really cry, cry
If anyone asks
I'll tell them we just grew apart
Yet what do i care
If they believe me or not
Whenever i feel your memory is breaking my heart
I'll pretend i'm okay with it all
Act like there's nothing wrong
Is it over yet
Can i open my eyes?
Is this as hard as it gets
Is this what it feels like to really cry, cry
I'm talking in circles
I'm lying, they know it
Why won't this just all go away?
Is it over yet
Can i open my eyes?
Is this as hard as it gets
Is this what it feels like to really cry, cry, cry
Now I tend to take your critisism into consideration but truly I keep going over it, its not that bad. The music and melody in my own poems are something subconcious that I don't put much effort in. Its something I realize much later....and I hate letting it hold me back from writing what I imagine...your welcome to try your hand at making it more lyrical since ur more music minded that I am...but remember I love the words...you love the music. We're bound to be different.
yes, I do love music and the harmony that it brings to satify my mind's requirements..
however, I really couldn't read it as poem.. it was just like mix & match to me.. but, i'd rather you create your own poem, than alter an existing one..
sometimes u get inspired by a song, or it triggers something in u.. but, seriously basing ur poem on it, would kill the newly born one..
just an opinion..
Post a Comment